Animal O-Blogger Post #2: Hamlet's Soliloquy

To be or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;
No more; and by a sleep to say we end
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks
That flesh is heir to, 'tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish'd. To die, to sleep;
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there's the rub;
For in that sleep of death what dreams may come
When we have shuffled off this mortal coil,
Must give us pause: there's the respect
That makes calamity of so long life;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The oppressor's wrong, the proud man's contumely,
The pangs of despised love, the law's delay,
The insolence of office and the spurns
That patient merit of the unworthy takes,
When he himself might his quietus make
With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear,
To grunt and sweat under a weary life,
But that the dread of something after death,
The undiscover'd country from whose bourn(e)
No traveller returns, puzzles the will
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to others that we know not of?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all;
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o'er with the pale cast of thought,
And enterprises of great pith and moment
With this regard their currents turn awry,
And lose the name of action.--Soft you now!
The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons
Be all my sins remember'd.

Hamlet's Soliloquy
by Chester the Monkey
Inevitable result of infinite keyboard strokes

Animal O-Blogger Post #1: s

sssssssssssssssss

"s"
by Petra Parrot
peck and peck

Annoucement: Non-Human O-Blogger Series

As Site Administrator for the Center for Outsider Blogging, I must be ever vigilant that all outsider bloggers in, and outside of, the blogosphere feel safe presenting their work at the Center. I am a mere deuteragonist in this intuitive drama, not a censor. In fact, I attempt to engage in a sort of radical free speech, wherein I never edit, and I seldom even read, the submissions to this website before posting them.

It was with the principles of art brut in mind that I realized the Center could be accused of Speciesism; that is, discriminating against a being because it belongs to a certain species. Of the posts published this year on this website, every single one was authored by a human mammal. I now seek to rectify this discrimination and attempt to reverse any pernicious affect this website has had on the animal kingdom by hosting a series of O-Blogs devoted to non-human bloggers.

Non-human bloggers are truly outside bloggers. It could be said that they are even further outside the dominant blogosphere than the legendary Garganno, the hermetic Bedouin blogger who lives in a cave in Sharjah and has never encountered electricity at all, much less artificial intelligence in computer form. Thus, in keeping with this site’s radical agenda we will no longer discriminate between human and non-human bloggers. Even philosopher and animal rights advocate Peter Singer wrote in Animal Liberation that "there are obviously important differences between human and other animals, and these differences must give rise to some differences in the rights that each have." We at the Center refuse to recognize these “important differences.”

I have cursorily reviewed many of our non-human submissions and I can assure you, Dear Reader, you are in for a treat with this series. Some non-human bloggers see the keyboard as a foodstuff, or a toilet. Some see the mouse as predator, others as prey. Still others just like the clicking sounds. However the non-human blogger conceptualizes his or her medium, what appears on the screen offers the reader transcendence.

Enjoy.